The new face of Byrne Hooters Dining Hall

Hanover, NH: Tuck students returning from winter break were shocked to find a whole new look at Byrne Dining Hall: Hooters.

The switch in sponsors comes amid widespread discontent among students, faculty and staff.  In December, riots broke out in Stell, fueled by the controversial student-run newspaper and $0.50 charges for each half-slice of extra cheese. 

The December riots forced the administration to take action, as any further unrest would surely be reflected in the rankings.

The deal offered by Hooters was too good to pass up.  According to a high ranking official: "Hooters came to us and offered to make a few cosmetic changes to our facility and staff.  We all know it would be impossible to make the food any worse, so what did we have to lose?"

In the end, Hooters decided not to make any changes to the food or prices.  Insider sources at Hooters indicate that it would be virtually impossible to match the margins earned by Dining Services, which are the highest in the world. 

Surprisingly, student discontent is at a minimum.  While some are upset by the objectification of women, there are no more complains about the food or prices.