Preview Email

 

 

First-Years Scramble For Housing

Hanover, NH: There has been a flurry of activity over the last few weeks as groups of first year students struggle to find their way around the winding streets of Norwich and Hanover, staking their claim to second year housing. Those late to the game have bitter regrets that they will miss out on the few plum and highly sought-after homes and are already making alternative arrangements. A sampling of the housing rumor mill:

  1. An unidentified 30 year old first year student is scoping out studio apartments on West Wheelock next to the Sigma Delta sorority house.
     

  2. Jonathan Fuisz T’08 is entrenched in negotiations with the MBAPO; both sides have locked horns over the proposal to lease Buchanan rooms for their proximity to the pong tables. Complicating Fuisz’ bid is T’07 Benjamin Farmer’s successful petition to stay a third year, living in Buchanan to improve his tutoring access to T’09 women.
     

  3. Francis Brooks T’08 has finally made her wish come true, nabbing a quiet corner room in Whittemore.
     

  4. Alexander Koepnick T'08 has approached Pier One and requested to "test-live" in their West Lebanon retail facility.  "I just love Pier One's stuff.  I could rotate through the store and provide feedback on the different furniture combinations.  I'm going to buy the stuff anyways, I might as well test drive it first."
     

  5. Edmond Griffin T’08 is actively seeking roommates after being left out in the cold by his intended roommates. A confused Jeff Young T’08 remarked, “Some guy named Ed keeps harassing me about housing.”
     

  6. Jeremy Sporn has also been kicked to the curb.  Said Scott Orleck T’08 and fellow Tripod Duck Hunter, “If Jeremy steals the puck from his own teammates, just think of what kind of roommate he’d be.”  Sporn’s fallback plan is to crash with Chris Hanley T’07, who has already locked up Center Ice.
     

  7. Jonathan Young T'08 hired Dennis Lasko T'08 to help "convince" the owners of The Grotto to rent it out.  But apparently they refused an offer they weren't supposed to be able to refuse.
     

  8. Against the advice of Professors Vogel and Rogalski, JC Olivarez T'08 is taking out an interest-only mortgage on a fixer-upper in the Lower Right Valley.