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Each month, The Profit brings you a panel of
trusted advisors to answer your most burning questions. This month, our
graduating T’08 advisors leverage their earned wisdom to provide a value
proposition to struggling T’09s.
May’s panel:
Dear Advisors,
Ugh, moving is such a pain in the ass! The
logistics are just so difficult. We have to be out of Buch on the 2nd,
but don’t start work until the 9th, or the 16th.
Then we can’t move into our new places until September. What are we
supposed to do with all our shit?
YB: It’s not about what to do with all your
stuff, what this is really about is about becoming a good leader, and
you know, getting to know yourself and to know your classmates and to
have the best work experience possible – it’s like, you have to ask
yourself, is what I’m doing here really really helping me to become the
best leader I can be, and really really helping Tuck, or is it just
really helping me, and if the latter is your answer, well then, you have
your answer, right?
Dear Advisors,
I got a little too drunk at the Bond Ball and
hooked up with a T’08. Now I’m afraid everyone will find out! What
should I do?
DH: Relax, Sam, it’s like, everyone already
knows about you, ok? I got pictures of that shit on my iPhone and shit.
Dude, it’s like, it’s like, it’s like, dude, you know, like, man, you’ve
just got to enjoy that while you can, you know what I’m sayin’? Just
enjoy that shit. We’ll all be gone in a week and nobody’s gonna
remember. And if they do, it’s like, man, Sam, yo, that dude’s a pimp,
dude!
Dear Advisors,
I started going out with a second-year chick
because I thought it would be easy ass and now she thinks we’re going to
have a relationship or some shit. How do I let her down easy so that I
don’t fuck my network?
DL: Dude, first of all, this is a quality
problem to have. “Oh no, I have to break up with the third girl in a
row that’s way too hot for me. What’s a boy to do?” Are you heading
off to New York to get more ass than a toilet seat? Yes. Am I getting
shipped off to Siberia where all the hot tail has already been
mail-ordered over here? Does a bear shit in the woods? All right, I
think we’re done here.
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